I
started serving at Church, our parish, Sagrada Familia when I was a child
around 8 years old as a member of choir on 4pm mass. I attended the church
every Sunday to serve and sing for the Lord. I joined many activities during
those times like making bible study (MKK) and praying the rosary (Fatima) once
a week at night in different houses in our community (Kawan ni St. Jude). I
also attended and participated in the central program of our Parish like the
“salubong”, the “sports fest”, the “catechesis”, and other contests and shows
that were concerned in our religion, Catholic.
As
time goes by, I stopped serving in church because I told to myself that I’m
grown up already that I don’t want to do it anymore because the happenings were
just repeatedly happening again and again every year. So I quitted and looked
for another circumstances. That time was my 1st year in High School
at aged 14, which made me busy doing my homework and gave me the reason to stop
doing those things. I said to myself that I will only stop participating in
church’s activities or focusing the programs but I will still attend the mass
every Sunday. Yet, I also didn’t go to church anymore.
But
now, here I am again, serving the Lord almighty. I was in 3rd year
high school, when the youth ministry of our Parish came to our house asking me
and my father to lead the youth of our neighborhood (Kawan). I didn’t agree
that time and told them I’m busy (but I wasn’t). By the way my father was an
active servant of our parish. He is the president of our neighborhood (Kawan).
He is the one who leads the street mass and the other religious
activities. So when the youth ministry
left our house, my father was pleasing me to accept their offer because he said
that Jesus is calling me to come nearer to Him, serve Him again and embrace Him
forever. He said that this is the time to ask for forgiveness and blessings for
my life and the people around me. Still, I disagree and started to discuss
conflict matters with him. I really didn’t feel serving that time and I thought
I wouldn’t enjoy being with those people because I may not express my feelings
and I should not do any wrong things because they are holy people. Then I get
off my mind with it however, Jesus is really calling me.
The
whole year of my 3rd year high school was my miserable year. I had a
lot of trouble with my teachers especially my adviser. I really felt depressed
and unhappy with my life because I didn’t feel like having real friends and no
one is caring with me when the teacher was mad at me. My grades got low and I
cannot do effortful projects anymore since I was down in the dumps. I also got
sickness and my ulcer was always attacking me. My stomach got really hurt and I
vomit a lot. My parents were pushed to send me in the hospital and it happened
many times during that year. I was lonely, I didn’t want to wake up anymore, I
didn’t want to go to school, and I didn’t want to do anything! So when the
youth ministry came over our house I pretended I don’t care to their offer. The
truth was I was excited that they themselves came in our house just to ask if I
can be with them. Actually I dreamed of having a good circle of friends like
them not holy, just well. Still I didn’t
show it to my father until he said that he already found a new one to be the
youth leader. I said that the girl was not that responsible and she cannot do
it so better me. I pretended again that I accepted the position not because I
want it or I want to serve again but because I’m just bored and wanted to go
out of the house this time. And I emphasized that the one he chose was not as
good as I am. So it was me already, the youth coordinator of our Kawan – St.
Jude. I attended the meetings and whatsoever commotions they may have.
Summer,
after my 3rd year high school, I attended the seminar for Catechesis
to become one of the “lecturer” of the word of the Lord to the children in
streets. I was bored in the seminar but because I accepted it I had to continue
– I took the responsibility. I first taught the children about Catechesis on
May 2009. I remembered when I was a kid I was the one who was being taught and
now I’m the one to teach them. I suddenly felt blessed that I’m experiencing it
so I decided to continue doing it every whole month of May, although I know
that someday I might not do it anymore because I will get my job that will make
me busy. So for now, I’m still a student which dictates that I will perform it
still.
I
became an active youth leader or youth coordinator of our “Kawan” after the May
2009 Catechesis. When I first attended the meeting I only knew several people
so I was quiet, I just listened to them and just agreed to whatever they were
planning. And now since I usually attend the meetings and join the activities
in our parish I got a lot of friends, I became known to the people even to our
parish priest (Fr. Jun Bartolome) and so I can already join the conversation of
every minutes of meetings and as time goes by I’m not quiet anymore. I can
already laugh with them and can communicate well, give my ideas and disagree if
I don’t like the offer of anybody. It just mean that I’m comfortable now being
with them and made me realize that they were not boring people that we both all
have the similarities.
Actually these
people around me now were not really HOLY. There are still dark side but we
think that it is natural especially to the youth like us. It is not a sin I think,
it is just an action that our parents might got angry. I’ll tell this dark side
story after this post. But since I’m stating how I got closer to God I should
not state it here. I love God Almighty so much that nobody can measure. Oh
Jesus, thank you for saving us all. I also thank you for calling me to serve
you because now I already know myself and I am happy with anybody around me
with no insecurities in me and no doubt of trusting them.
I am a servant
of God before, now and forever!
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